Twilight Skits

[Artemis Cullen]

I agree with that!

[WinniePony]

Perfect! That means I can now procrastinate my essay comparing Julius Caesar and Macbeth! You guys rock.

At the Cullens' house...
Bella: *lying in bed* Shut up Dinglehopper! Just shut up!
*long pause*
Bella: Will someone please stop the jingle bells from eating me?
Narrator: Ehm... We'll leave Bella alone for now. Onto more interesting things.

In a random meadow in a random country near a random Dutch town...because Dutch people talk funny
Rosalie: So... why are we here again?
Emmett: *shrugs* Beats me. Wanna make out?
Jake: Sure!
Emmett:
Jake: Oh...
*awkward silence*
Nessie: *sniffs* I miss Daddy. Why can't we go ask the people in that town if they've seen him?
Rosalie: *exasperated sigh* I told you already, Nessie. Those people are DUTCH.
Nessie: So?
Emmett: So Rosie has issues with Dutch people.
Jake: No. Freaking. Way. Blondie's scared of Dutch people?
Rosalie: *snaps* I didn't say scared, dog.
Jake: Then what's the issue?
Emmett: She didn't say scared, but that's what she meant.
Rosalie: We are most definitely not making out right now.
Emmett:
Nessie: What's wrong with Dutch people, Rosie?
Rosalie: It's a long story.
Jake: *smug smile* We've got time.

In the random Dutch village...
DutchPerson1: Hoosken noonen dinglevoonen.
DutchPerson2: Like, jookin vookin dearwiboofin?
DP1: *shrugs* Looben doo.
Narrator: I'm afraid our translator has stepped outside... We'll come back to the Dutch people later.

In an old, rusty van...
Esme: Carlisle, are you sure these are the right directions?
Carlisle: *whining* This is what MapQuest gave me!
Esme: Okay... Alice, remind me again why we're in an old, rusty van.
Alice: It's for dramatic effect! And it TOTALLY goes with my awesome, rocker-chick outfit.
Carlisle: *still whining* Why can't we find the stupid warehouse?
Alice: TURN RIGHT!
*the car screeches around a corner, into a dark alley*
Alice: *sighs happily* Okay, now we'll get there.
Carlisle: *who is still whining, much to the delight of the director* Alice! This isn't what MapQuest said to do!
Alice: Are you going to listen to stupid MapQuest, or your psychic daughter?!
Esme: Look, it's a warehouse!
Alice: *sticks out tongue at Carlisle* Told you.
Carlisle: *sulks*

Ah. I feel much better now. Oh and in case you couldn't tell, I made everyone normal again. Like...POOF. No more farm animals. We can say that...the impact from Bella running into the door magically made them all normal again. Kay? I was just too lazy to type in all the moos and whatever. Whoo!

[Artemis Cullen]

Haha! Nice Skit Winniepony!

[WinniePony]

Thank you. Now someone needs to post another one so I can post another one. It would be really weird doing 3 in a row... Come on people, I need to procrastinate history!!!

[rapid_reader1]

Um, ok, I think i missed something; when did the cullens/bella/jake become human again?

[Artemis Cullen]

Oh! That's easy! Winnepony made it so that when Bella hit herself on the head she and the rest of the Cullen's and Jake went back into their 'human forms' again, because she was too lazy to write the moo's and cluck's ...

No offense Winniepony! I just repeated what you said.

BTW what do you guy's think about my Avatar and Banner?

[rapid_reader1]

I love your avvie, Artemis! It's so funny I also love your banner! His face is kinda funny

[Artemis Cullen]

Thanks! I was cracking up when I made my Avi.

Rob's face is kind of funny but he's still hot!

[WinniePony]

Heh. Your avvie is very cute, despite the fact that Rob is ugly and definitely not Edward. Sorry, just had to say that.

Someone needs to post another skit!!! I'm going through skits withdrawl...

[lidiacriss]

ugh... I haven't been on in forever

*in a random meadow in a random country near a random dutch town*
Jake: I want to hear about the dutch people, come on blondie
Nessie: yeah!
Rosalie: NO!
Emmett: oh oh! I wanna tell I wanna tell!!! Pick me! pick me!
Rosalie: there's nothing to pick you for emmett nobody is telling the mutt about the dutch people!
Emmett: pplllllleeeeeeaaaaaaaassssssseeeeeee
Rose: NNNNOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
Emmett:*goes and pouts in corner that happens to be in the meadow*

*in van outside of warehouse*
Alice: come one you guys, lets go save jazzy!
Carlisle: I'm not going
Esme: why not?
Carlisle: this is the wrong warehouse mapquest is always right!
Alice: mapquest is wrong! now come one We're going to save Jazzy
Carlisle: No!
Alice: yes!
Carlisle:no!
Esme: Carlisle..... Alice.... don't fight we need to save Jasper
Carlisle:*sticks out tongue at Alice* fine, but I'm staying here
Alice: Fine, then I'll go by myself *walks into warehouse yelling* Jazzy! JAzzy!
Carlisle: *starts driving away in van*
Esme: what are you doing!
Carlisle: ditching alice!
Esme: whY?
Carlisle: because she's being mean, and I want her to have to walk home *evil grin* serves her right