Things that would never be said in the Twilght Saga

Re: Things that would never be said in the Twilght Saga

Postby Mrs.Edward_Cullen<3 » Tue Apr 28, 2009 8:52 pm

(in Eclipse when Bella and Edward attempt their *ahem* compromise *ahem.)

Edward:Count backwards 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 before you get too heated and turned on.
Bella:Then there’s my mind saying, think before you go through that door it could lead to nowhere (this guy) has got you all
romantic crazy in your head do you think I listen? No, I don't care.

Edward:Bella love I don't think we--
Bella: You'll never get to Heaven, if your scared of gettin’ high (Boy, boy) Let me keep freaking around, I wanna get down I'm a red-blooded woman, what's the point of hanging around? (Boy, boy)Don't wanna keep turning it down, when this girl wants to rock with you (yea)

:lol: :lol: Haha song is Red Blooded Woman by Kylie Minogue. Listen to it and you'll get what I'm saying saying. :lol:
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Re: Things that would never be said in the Twilght Saga

Postby ♥midnight_sun♥ » Tue Apr 28, 2009 9:05 pm

sarah! wrote:
♥midnight_sun♥ wrote:Very, very bored and just remembered a fanfic I read ages ago! So...

(Edward and Bella are sitting in the living room, Nessie walks in)
Bella: Nessie? Where's Jake? I thought you two went on a picnic together in the woods?
Nessie: Oh that...well you see...umm...
Edward: *in a stern voice* Nessie...what are you hiding that I can't read in your mind?
Nessie: Umm...well...I think we need to move...Now.
Bella: Why? What happened?
Edward: *looks up at Nessie and smiles widely* Come here Nessie...I want to thank you, congratulate you, and give you a big hug for what you did.
Bella: :shock: Edward! Nessie! WHAT HAPPENED!?
Nessie: I got tired of Jake...I don't love him anymore
Edward: So she hung him in the woods. :D
Bella: Okay!


OMJ! :lol:
Poor Jake!!


:lol: :lol: I know! I have random thoughts going through my head all the time and I just happen to think of this fanfic I read where Edward kills Jake and I thought this up. Team Jake people really aren't going to like this but whatever!
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Re: Things that would never be said in the Twilght Saga

Postby sarah! » Tue Apr 28, 2009 11:34 pm

They shouldn't get mad.
It's just a joke. :lol:
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Re: Things that would never be said in the Twilght Saga

Postby ♥midnight_sun♥ » Tue Apr 28, 2009 11:36 pm

I know but some people are very protective of Jake...or Jake/Nessie
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Re: Things that would never be said in the Twilght Saga

Postby Daniellea » Wed Apr 29, 2009 6:44 pm

Charlie: So, what happened to Bella, anyway?
Carlisle: In the process of her baby bursting out of her stomach, Bella's heart stopped beating and the only thing that could save her was vampire venom.
Charlie: Sweet! So now she has super powers.
Yay Percabeth!
also a tiny bit of Alice/Jasper.
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Re: Things that would never be said in the Twilght Saga

Postby Daniellea » Wed Apr 29, 2009 7:47 pm

Rosalie: I'm too sexy for my blonde *takes off what turns out to be a wig*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Bella: You know, Edward, I think we should get a pet. A cat, maybe.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Esme: Carlisle, you're eternally gorgeous and all that, but my true love all this time was Cheif Swan.
Carlisle: OMG, me too! :D
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Edward: Bella, now that your smell doesn't put me in excessive pain, I've lost my interest.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jane: Don't you think our ability to torture isn't enough?
Alec: We should step it up a bit.
Jane: Agreed.
Alec: After we've escaped the Volturi, we can get it on like Diddy Kong!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jacob: Bella, I have always loved you and always will, but... *points toward Rosalie* She manages to be smokin hot and ice cold at one time! *whistle*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Maria: Jasper, I need you to stop drinking blood. Forever and ever.
Jasper: Ok! *cheerfully skips away, whistling a jolly tune*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Edward: Jacob, you smell too good to be true.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And... that's all I can come up with. My head's a shell.
Yay Percabeth!
also a tiny bit of Alice/Jasper.
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Re: Things that would never be said in the Twilght Saga

Postby Jasper<3 » Thu Apr 30, 2009 7:35 pm

Daniellea wrote:~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Esme: Carlisle, you're eternally gorgeous and all that, but my true love all this time was Cheif Swan.
Carlisle: OMG, me too! :D
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Edward: Bella, now that your smell doesn't put me in excessive pain, I've lost my interest.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jacob: Bella, I have always loved you and always will, but... *points toward Rosalie* She manages to be smokin hot and ice cold at one time! *whistle*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Edward: Jacob, you smell too good to be true.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

:lol: :lol: I love them! I see you are new here, I am Nat. And just a warning, you double-posted, though obviously on accident. If you ever want to post a second time, but you are the last post, use the edit button located at the top of your post. If a mod catches a double-post, they really don't like it. So yeah.... But kudos to the funny! :mrgreen:
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Re: Things that would never be said in the Twilght Saga

Postby ringswraith » Thu Apr 30, 2009 7:46 pm


Paul: (rides in on a motorcycle, looking very much like a rebel)
Everyone: (stares)
Paul: What? Jacob's the only one who can ride a bike and be all "bad boy" and stuff? (Jacob's sister comes out.) Hi pumpkin.
Last edited by ringswraith on Sat May 09, 2009 2:25 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Things that would never be said in the Twilght Saga

Postby ringswraith » Sat May 09, 2009 2:24 am

(Is it double-posting if my last post was a week ago?)

(Far future, past Breaking Dawn.)

Paul: My kid totally just started walking!
Embry: Yeah? How old is she again?
Paul: Eleven months.
Jared: That's awesome man.
Jacob: Nessie started walking at three months.
(silence)
Paul: ...Shut up, Jacob.
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Re: Things that would never be said in the Twilght Saga

Postby ♥midnight_sun♥ » Sat May 09, 2009 2:50 am

^I don't know if it is still considered double posting or not but your stuff is always :lol: :lol: :lol: .

(Everyone is sitting around the living room)
Edward: I'm bored.
Bella: I second that.
Emmett: *raises hand and waves it around like a child* Ooo! Ooo! i know! I know!
Everyone: No!
*a few minutes later*
Alice: *sigh* Okay, Emmett...what's your 'big idea'.
Emmett: Well...I thought it would be fun to go rob a bank!
Rose: Emmett, we have no reason to. We have an unlimited supply of money.
Alice: Umm...about that...I kinda spent all the money on shopping.
Everyone else: :shock: :o
Emmett: Cool! We now have reason to rob a bank!
Everyone else: *makes a noise of agreement and all go to rob the local bank*

^This is what happens when I'm bored, I come up with random situations that would never really happen and put them in it. :roll:
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