OMG, LINK LINK TO THE FAN FIC?
Well, it's not a list.
Is just that sometimes I listen to those songs and i'm like 'that would be perfect..'
Muse - Time is Running Out
Hillary Duff - Reach out. (very very sexy).
&& this one became sexy after it came on on my bf iPod one night, haha.
John Mayer - Gravity. It's slow and sexy.
and John Mayer - Slow dancing in a burning room.
I already started some story a while ago, and kept writing today.
this is what I have. Should I continue? I don't know where to post it though.
‘Heal with me’
As I laid there on my bed, the world seemed to have turned its back on me. Could so much misery be possible? Could I feel more empty than this? I felt no beating in my chest, no heart. It was all gone.
I remembered clearly the day it all “died”. The day I died, that’s what I thought of myself now. I was dead, but I just kept walking and breathing somehow. After two years together he left. Just remembering his face and the last day I saw him made my body ache, and I could feel my heart, or what was left of it scream in pain.
How could he do that to me? Leave me here after all we’ve been through? After our future together was already planned after endless nights of talking? How could he hurt me this way? He loved me… or so I thought.
After three months it still hurt. But I swore to myself I was not going to let myself down. I loved him with every inch of my body, of my heart, but I couldn’t just let it consume me like a cancer, taking each of my organs, step by step until it was already too late. He was my cancer, and I could feel it taking over me.
Night after night I would fight with my options. Was it worth living anymore? Could I possibly live this lifeless live I was living for long? It was so painful. But I wasn’t a coward, it will soon get better, it had to.
Remembering the nights we spent together never helped, how he kissed my neck inch by inch, how he caressed my back with his fingertips, how he kissed me so intensely that I could feel the world stop around me. Those were memories I needed to bury deep down. I needed to heal.
Today I woke up feeling lighter; somehow the pain I’ve been feeling for these past three months became bearable. I stood up from my bed feeling rested for the first time in a while. I hadn’t been taking sleeping pills for over a week now, and my eyes weren’t swollen and red this morning. I didn’t shed even one tear last night. This was my cue to go on with my life.
Life had become a routine for me, nothing exciting ever happened, I decided to take off a semester from Design School, so I pretty much had my whole day to cry and cry, and keep crying; until today. I put my robe on and went straight to the studio where my computer rested peacefully over my 1952’s old desk. There was something about old furniture that I loved; the story behind it always seemed to thrill me, what if the great Frank Sinatra wrote the fantastic “I did it my way” on that desk?
chapter one not finished, obviously haha.
Last edited by ana;
on Thu Dec 04, 2008 3:53 am, edited 1 time in total.