Things that would never be said in the Twilight Saga II

Things having to do with Twilight that are related to the book: fanfic, rpg, products, websites, book clubs, etc.

Moderators: Bronze Haired Girl, una

Forum rules
Click for Forum Rules

Things that would never be said in the Twilight Saga II

Postby Nena » Sat Jul 18, 2009 7:28 pm

Time for a new thread. Keep it PG-13.

Carry on with the humorous will-never-happens.
Image
User avatar
Nena
Altering source code with Jasper
 
Posts: 1046
Joined: Thu Aug 14, 2008 8:31 pm

Re: Things that would never be said in the Twilight Saga II

Postby ringswraith » Mon Jul 20, 2009 2:00 pm

Bella walks into the first floor and hears Edward on the piano. She zips to his side, listening, and frowns as she recognizes the music. "Edward? Why are you playing the theme to The Twilight Zone?"

"There is a fifth dimension," Edward begins, "beyond that which is known to man. It is a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity. It is the middle ground between light and shadow, between science and superstition, and it lies between the pit of man's fears and the summit of his knowledge. This is the dimension of imagination. It is an area which we call the Twilight Zone."

Emmett pipes up from the sofa. "Submitted for your perusal: Isabella Marie Swan, only daughter of Charlie and Renee, spirited away by her mother to Arizona when she could not stand the little town of Forks anymore. Years later Renee finds a new love, and Isabella- Bella- decides to move back to Forks and live with her father, Charlie. She's young, intelligent, and best of all, unattached." Someone snickers. "She didn't come looking for love, but finds herself strangely attracted to Edward Cullen, member of a family so strange that everyone at school gives them a wide berth.

"But are they really just strange, or is there more than meets the eye? Will Bella figure out the sinister truth before it's too late?"

Edward punctuated his brother's words with a very macabre-sounding dun dun dunn on the piano.

Rosalie rolled her eyes. "Isabella Marie Swan- This is Your Life."
ringswraith
Running with Leah 'cause she thinks I'm hawt
 
Posts: 4633
Joined: Fri Dec 12, 2008 3:46 pm

Re: Things that would never be said in the Twilight Saga II

Postby purple_panda » Mon Jul 20, 2009 2:34 pm

^lol
edward: rose, can you please hand me the scissors? i need to curl the ribbon for nessie's christmas present
rosalie: here *hands edward a pair of scissors*
emmett: aaah! its edward scissorhands!
http://www.fictionpress.com/s/2789848/1/Genzaria
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5038757/1/Twilight_On_Crack
User avatar
purple_panda
Jump Starting Bella's Truck
 
Posts: 107
Joined: Sat Mar 14, 2009 9:46 pm
Location: saturn

Re: Things that would never be said in the Twilight Saga II

Postby JenTheWriter » Thu Jul 23, 2009 7:12 pm

lol@ringswraith

*The Cullens watching Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince*

Cullens: *mouths hang open in shock*
Bella: Well, even though it wasn't as close to the book as I would have liked -- I still liked it.
Jacob: Yeah, books-to-movies generally never stay with the concept.
Renesmee: *nods* That's too true. I just wish Harry Potter would stay closer to the books.
Edward: Tell me about it. They butchered my part in Goblet of Fire!
"And if you ever kiss her again, I will break your jaw for her," he promised.
Image
Team Edward, Alice and Cullen! Swoonist. Mrs.Edward_Cullen<3's brain twin!
User avatar
JenTheWriter
Has Caught Sight of Edward
 
Posts: 1067
Joined: Tue Jan 27, 2009 11:51 pm
Location: Moses Lake, Washington

Re: Things that would never be said in the Twilight Saga II

Postby IloveAliceCullen<3 » Mon Jul 27, 2009 5:59 am

Nessie: I want you to do it, Jakie.
Jacob: To do what?
Nessie: Make me happy by acting like an idiot.
Jacob: No, I'm not doing it for you. I'm depressed today and I'm not going to make you happy.
Nessie: Grr, then I will bring you to a shelter. I'm dumping you, DOG.
Nessie to Edward: Daddy, take Jake outside and bring him to a doghotel.
Nessie to Jake: Hope someone will adopt you, but I don't think so. Mongrel. :x
Damon and Elena, there is definetly love between them.

Image
"There hadn't been butterflies in her stomach, there had been bats."

Damon's POV~ I will be I swear Surrender

rapid_reader1 is the best VFF ever!
User avatar
IloveAliceCullen<3
Hiding Lauren's Hair Dye
 
Posts: 422
Joined: Sun Mar 08, 2009 5:08 pm
Location: Living in the Netherlands

Re: Things that would never be said in the Twilight Saga II

Postby LionandLamb123 » Wed Aug 05, 2009 5:10 pm

Alice: Jasper...I'm breaking up with you.
Jasper: :shock:
Alice: I can't keep denying my love for Robert Pattinson.


ringswraith wrote:Bella walks into the first floor and hears Edward on the piano. She zips to his side, listening, and frowns as she recognizes the music. "Edward? Why are you playing the theme to The Twilight Zone?"

"There is a fifth dimension," Edward begins, "beyond that which is known to man. It is a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity. It is the middle ground between light and shadow, between science and superstition, and it lies between the pit of man's fears and the summit of his knowledge. This is the dimension of imagination. It is an area which we call the Twilight Zone."

Emmett pipes up from the sofa. "Submitted for your perusal: Isabella Marie Swan, only daughter of Charlie and Renee, spirited away by her mother to Arizona when she could not stand the little town of Forks anymore. Years later Renee finds a new love, and Isabella- Bella- decides to move back to Forks and live with her father, Charlie. She's young, intelligent, and best of all, unattached." Someone snickers. "She didn't come looking for love, but finds herself strangely attracted to Edward Cullen, member of a family so strange that everyone at school gives them a wide berth.

"But are they really just strange, or is there more than meets the eye? Will Bella figure out the sinister truth before it's too late?"

Edward punctuated his brother's words with a very macabre-sounding dun dun dunn on the piano.

Rosalie rolled her eyes. "Isabella Marie Swan- This is Your Life."


LOL :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
Image
User avatar
LionandLamb123
Touched By Cold Hands
 
Posts: 1227
Joined: Thu Sep 18, 2008 7:48 pm
Location: The Meadow =]

Re: Things that would never be said in the Twilight Saga II

Postby Openhome » Wed Aug 05, 2009 5:45 pm

Emmett bangs on a door in the Cullen house, jumping up and down with his legs tight together.

Emmett: Rosalie! Get out of the bathroom! I have to use it!
User avatar
Openhome
Corralling the Cullens while Esme's Away
 
Posts: 2595
Joined: Thu Apr 09, 2009 3:54 pm
Location: Chatting with Esme and giving her parenting advice

Re: Things that would never be said in the Twilight Saga II

Postby DudeRocksTheTwilight » Wed Aug 05, 2009 7:37 pm

Hilarious everyone!
This is me: :arrow: :D :lol: :) :D ;) :lol: 8-) :twisted: :mrgreen:
Lol.
I'm lurking, I will come up with one eventually!
Image
Al Puccini of the Mafia, Santiago of Volturi, Major Peter of JCA, EDC Bulldozer Trainee, APPC Host Jenni - TwiGirl
User avatar
DudeRocksTheTwilight
I'm A Proud Twilight Guy
 
Posts: 3825
Joined: Sun Feb 08, 2009 3:05 pm
Location: Chugging the postahol. On MSN, most likely. Tieing Sarah in thunderball.

Re: Things that would never be said in the Twilight Saga II

Postby 19nomad90 » Thu Aug 06, 2009 10:53 am

(During the birth in Breaking Dawn)

Edward pressed his face to the bump, using his teeth to help free the baby. Finally it managed to escape but Edward was suddenly still.
"Erm... Bella... what on Earth is going on here?"
Bella looked up to see Edward holding a russet-coloured werewolf puppy, looking livid.
"Hmm... who saw that coming? I'm sorry Edward I swear it was only once!" From somewhere in the house, Jacob snickered. He always knew he'd win in the end.
Image

Favourite werewolf? Sorry Jake, I'm TEAM SETH all the way!!
19nomad90
Helping Mike to Get a Clue
 
Posts: 575
Joined: Wed Aug 05, 2009 12:39 am
Location: England... almost as cold as Forks

Re: Things that would never be said in the Twilight Saga II

Postby willowtree » Thu Aug 13, 2009 10:24 am

haha very funny everyone... I thought of some this morning but they got lost in the clump that is my head. oops. :oops:

~h. f. e. l.
Image

-Hanni

(banner=not mine.)
User avatar
willowtree
Eating Spaghetti with Billy
 
Posts: 3347
Joined: Fri Jul 31, 2009 11:17 am
Location: Kicking butt with her awesome Ninjasissyvildypuceowner!

Next

Return to In the Twilight Zone

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests