Sorry to double post, but I feel that I need to share this with you about me, as I posted this at the HH Facebook, and I know that not all of you can see it there:
Sorry for posting so damn much, but my mind's been all over the place here. I'm also sorry if some of my comments may have offended anyone.
Please allow me to explain something. I've never been one to fit in. I'm a fan of Kristen's, and have been a long time. She introduced me to Rob, who I also love, and to the Twilight Saga and to you interesting and loving people. I'm not willing to throw her away for her making a dumb mistake, no more than I am willing to do the same to Rob.
But I'm extremely hurt and confused by her actions, and I have to say that her behavior has been off though out this month, and even Rob's at times, and that's also very confusing to me, too. I'm very concerned for both Kristen and Rob, and I love them and I want the best for them, be it together or apart.
But more importantly, I want to talk about me and what I'm going through right now. I feel that I'm at fault a bit for how I feel, because as a fan of theirs, I fell into the trap of putting them up on a pedestal as a couple, they fell, and now my heart's broken. I have myself partly to blame for that, because I feel into a trap that I should not have.
I'm very contrary to you guys, in that I'm an actual guy, I like Kristen very slightly more than Rob (but I love them both, don't get me wrong), and it's because of that love that I'm pissed and scared and disappointed and concerned for them right now. To say that this doesn't effect me would be a lie. But to say that I also felt like I conned myself by believing in a H'wood relationship that the odds were against them from the start would also be a major lie.
Also, all the theories about this being staged, some publicity stunt gone bad, that this was a one time fling, or a longer term deal, everyone's all over the damn place, I don't know what or who to believe.
But I'll tell you this, I love you guys, and you've been extremely supportive of me in my times of need, and if any of you want to vent or whatever, I'll always be there with a compassionate ear. I may think myself a hard man, I've lived a hard life and I'm jaded and have a generally negative view of the world, and I'm about 6 months younger than Rob is, and I know that Rob's quite the opposite of me LOL
But none the less, I've got plenty of right over this and my real life to be pissed off at the world and believe that 12/21/2012 can't get here fast enough if the Mayans were right. But all of that has also taught me compassion and caring and love, which is why I want a GF. I believe myself to be a very loving and caring person, and I refuse to let this scandal bring me down as far as that's concerned. I'm gonna be hurting for a while, but you're there for me. I want to be there for you guys, too. We might not all agree, but I'll be here if you want to talk, and you girls are the reason, with your words of love and compassion, is why I don't want to leave.
The wound is fresh, or hearts are broken, we're all in shock. If anyone want to take time off from here, that's fine by me if that'll help you. I might do the same. I might not be online as much over the next few days, but if anyone has something specific that they want to send me, feel free to message me. I think that I'll suck as a counselor LOL, but I'll listen, and that's what I'm here for.
Thank you all for making me feel welcomed and trying to accommodate me and make me comfortable and putting up with me the past year or so. I love you all Susie
: Even though you and I may beg to differ on how we feel about Kristen, this applies to you to
And no, I haven't had any FB troubles. I can't explain that either
I'll be back later.