Funny Stories

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eliselovesedwardx
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Re: Funny Stories

Post by eliselovesedwardx »

Ok the problem with my funny stories is they're all pretty much "had-to-be-there" moments..

We go to the Japanese restaurant often with our friends and I cannot use chopsticks. This one time I was attempting to pick up a piece of tofu with them but it just wouldn't go! So I decided I would just stab them through. SO i did and managed to eat the piece, but then the waitress came over and handed me a knife and fork. I just thought "thanks..:?" but then we looked over at the chef and he was absolutely cacking himself laughing at me!
Then when we went to leave he came out to say goodbye and then he teased me and did an impersonation of me trying to stab my chopsticks through the tofu! It was quite embarrassing.. :oops:

OH! And then the other day I was driving with Mum (I'm on my 'L's on a manual) and we were stopped at traffic lights. A car pulled up next to us and it was my old netball coach (male and we always used to have mini fights and teasing) and he saw that I was driving. Well he found this hilarious and so decided to rev his car and was like "ready? READY?!" I shouted at him to shut up but he wouldn't stop and then he was like "ready! ready! GO!" and the light turned green AND I STALLED! :oops: Well he found this absolutely HILARIOUS! So did Mum..Then I finally got going and he was still laughing at me in the rear vision mirror. I was so embarrassed but mum wouldn't let me forget it!

yeah, not very funny but they were at the time..
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Re: Funny Stories

Post by Waffle of Doom »

I was standing outside my school today with a friend, Gabby, waiting for my mom to pick us up, and I'm looking out at the parking lot and I see a silver Volvo S60, and I turn to Gabby and mention how much I love those cars and how awesome it was that somebody we went to school with had one, and I hear a guys voice from behind me say, "That's my car." I turn around and the hot new guy was standing there. Well, sometimes I have issues filtering my thoughts, so I blurt out, "Wow, you're hot," Gabby doubled over in laughter and he looked at me weird and walked away. I don't think my face could have been any redder if I had poured red paint on it. :oops:
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Re: Funny Stories

Post by Black »

This one happened a few summers ago:

It was around 11:30 pm and my sister and I decided to walk up to the little convenience store to get some snacks. We got our muffins and whatnot and by the time we started walking back it was almost midnight so we decided to take the darker back sidewalks so we wouldn't be spotted by police as it was past curfew.

On our way, we walked past the courthouse sign that said "Fort Feree was located 1,000 feet east of this site. Many of the soldiers that died during [some] battle in 1812 are buried in this courthouse yard." I looked up at the courthouse clock and whispered to my sister, "What if the soldiers come up out of the ground when the clock strikes 12 ? " She told me to shut up and we continued walking. Not five minutes later the clock started to chime. 1 strike.. 2 strikes.. 3 strikes.. my sister took off running.

As soon as I caught up to her I convinced her that nothing was going to get us and told her to walk. But that wasn't enough for me. A few minutes after she calmed down I looked behind us and screamed. She about cried (seriously) and I started busting out laughing. She told me that she hated me and when she was done freaking out encouraged me to walk faster so that the "cops" wouldn't get us.

We didn't say much the rest of the way home (I was too busy sniggering) but I noticed my sister looking back every few seconds to make sure nothing.... unnatural was coming after us.

Afterward she made it clear that she was never walking anywhere with me ever again.
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uniqueTWILIGHTfan
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Re: Funny Stories

Post by uniqueTWILIGHTfan »

Like many peoples stories this is one of those you-had-to-be-there kind of stories.

Last year one of my friends and I were sitting outside of a store selling Girl Scout Cookies(yes I am still in Girl Scouts) and this really hot guy walked up and bought some cookies and my friend who is extremely shy was giggling uncontrolably beside me and he noticed and right before he walked away he smiled at her and "purrred" and I swear I didn't know that shade of red exsisted :oops: . I was almost crippled with laughter. :lol:
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Re: Funny Stories

Post by DunnerheartsTwilight »

...hahah we were in class today and my friend was talking about lead ... and i was like ya pencils dont have lead anymore cause it was poisoness... now they have graffite... and he put something in his mouth (a tic tac) and i thought it was the graffite... and i was like just becasue its not poisoned you dont have to eat it... and then he started laughing whiich got me laughing and it was really random... ohh and it was during french soo our french teacher thought we were nuts...
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Re: Funny Stories

Post by bite_me »

Waffle of Doom wrote: And then a few weeks later my mother, my best friend, and I were driving to the movies and for some reason we started talking about what we would name our kids if we ever had them. After my bff said what she would name her's I said, "If I ever have kids I want to name one of the Felix Demetri or Felix James Demetri." My bff says, "what if your husband doesn't like that name?" and I replied, "Screw my husband." I swear without missing a beat or even looking away from the road my mom says, "You're not allowed to do that." Me and my bff started laughing hysterically. .
When I was little I had this little spiel that I said to everyone who asked me what I'd name my kids (I think my mum told them to ask me):

*in baby voice* "When I grow up, I'm going to have three children, and I'm gonna name them Soffy-Top-Top, Loveflower, and John-Jack."

I'm not quite sure about the spelling of the first one, but I'm sure if I'd stuck with my idea, my eldest would have renamed herself Sophie.
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Re: Funny Stories

Post by Black »

DunnerheartsTwilight wrote:...hahah we were in class today and my friend was talking about lead ... and i was like ya pencils dont have lead anymore cause it was poisoness... now they have graffite... and he put something in his mouth (a tic tac) and i thought it was the graffite... and i was like just becasue its not poisoned you dont have to eat it... and then he started laughing whiich got me laughing and it was really random... ohh and it was during french soo our french teacher thought we were nuts...
I actually think that's kind of funny... lol.
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Re: Funny Stories

Post by xXBeSafeXx »

bite_me wrote: When I was little I had this little spiel that I said to everyone who asked me what I'd name my kids (I think my mum told them to ask me):

*in baby voice* "When I grow up, I'm going to have three children, and I'm gonna name them Soffy-Top-Top, Loveflower, and John-Jack."

I'm not quite sure about the spelling of the first one, but I'm sure if I'd stuck with my idea, my eldest would have renamed herself Sophie.
Oh, I cannot stop laughing. That is awesome. I can just see somebody named Soffy-Top-Top. It would be hell for them everywhere they went. :lol: Buying a credit card, becoming a lawyer(The honorable Judge Soffy-Top-Top), even when they go to officially get their name changed.

You brightened up my day considerably with that story. :lol:
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bite_me
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Re: Funny Stories

Post by bite_me »

glad you liked it!

There is this rabbit next door, it's really cute and its a dwarf rabbit. Its name is tulip.

Our cat gretel, fat, snobby, and twice the size of the rabbit, is scared of it. When gretel worked out how to get into next door by climbing over the wall she came across the rabbit, who was out of its hutch at the time. She was curious so she went up to sniff it. as soon as she went to sniff it, tulip hissed, whirled around and started chasing gretel. Gretel freaked out and started running but she hadnt worked out yet how to get back over the fence into our garden, so with her fur up and her tail fluffed she was sprinting around desperately trying to escape from a mad rabbit while the neighbours were killing themselves laughing. Gretel wouldn't go back there for a week.

Probably one of those had-to-be-there moments, but oh well.
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Re: Funny Stories

Post by xXBeSafeXx »

On my 13th birthday, I went to a Japanese resaurant with a friend. First, the waitress brought me a styrofoam cup, and I was deeply offended. I drank it in a minute, planning on making the waitress run back and forth all night refilling it to pay for the injustice she did to me. :lol: So, when I was about halfway done with my second cup, my friend pipes up, and goes, "Um, excuse me, I think my friend might need a bigger cup. She's really thirsty tonight." :lol:

When I was little, I had a dog. My neighbors had a peacock. When said dog was a puppy, the peacock would corner her under the air conditioner. Shadow was terrified of the peacock. So, my parents would come out and chase away the peacock with the water hose. Anyway, Shadow grew into a big dog, but the peacock still thought he could intimidate her. Shadow didn't fit under the air conditioner anymore. So one day, we were coming home from town, and we heard noise from out back. We went around to the backyard, and Shadow was chasing the peacock with the water hose! It wasn't turned on, but it was hilarious, and we knew she could defend herself now. :lol:
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