Dating Thread

Re: Dating Thread

Postby igotrhythm » Sat Aug 23, 2008 8:10 pm

GESH- I'd try to talk to him, first, like a_n_n_a said. Make sure he knows you don't see him that way. After having a nice conversation, see if you feel comfortable being friends. If it makes you feel awkward to be around him, then maybe try to tell him, very nicely, that you don't feel comfortable hanging around him much because he has those feelings for you and you don't want to hurt him(if you have a problem confronting him about this, just try to avoid him as much as possible, although that's not always the best option). You shouldn't have to make yourself uncomfortable because you think you're hurting him or because he is putting you in an awkward position.

SimplyMortal- That's kinda funny about Stanley. Looks like somebody's got a crush!(Stanley, not you, obviously...) Don't feel bad because you smiled and waved at him, like you would for bus boy. It was the courteous, nice thing to do.

About the Date-Food question: I would say some kind of chocolate dessert, like brownies. Obviously, a lot of that stems from the fact that I might as well be registered at Chocoholics Anonymous, but I think chocolate is a RELATIVELY universal food that most people would like and is fun to eat, without being too messy or elaborate.

By the way, thanks to everyone for the advice. You're right- I was just confused about Matt(#1) because I wasn't expecting to see him again and it kinda took me by surprise. Matt #2 is much better.

I've got a new dating question- How much is too much? Is talking to a guy for too long or very often(sometimes more often than to a lot of other people) being "pushy," or is it an expected part of the dating "experience"?
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Re: Dating Thread

Postby eternitys_charm » Sat Aug 23, 2008 9:37 pm

igotrhythm wrote:I've got a new dating question- How much is too much? Is talking to a guy for too long or very often(sometimes more often than to a lot of other people) being "pushy," or is it an expected part of the dating "experience"?

I find it an expected part of dating, its fine if you talk to the person you like more. But just dont ignore everyone else. If all that is good then its fine :)

I've got a question-Is dating the same person twice okay?
because i still like my ex...a lot and he does too, when we broke up it was sudden because of stress going on with my family but i wanna go back out again. But we constantly fought together and it was irritating, also im quite a jealous person and i know a girl likes him right now that we're not together. What should i do??
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Re: Dating Thread

Postby lovemesomecullensss » Sat Aug 23, 2008 9:42 pm

Love you, too, dear. :] I'm sure FF has a good reason as to why he couldn't go to the movies with you. Sometimes people are just busy or have plans. Don't sweat it. And try not to dwell on BG; that'll just make it harder to let go. Don't try to analyze whether or not he was blushing because of you. Maybe he was, maybe he wasn't. That's not your concern. You may eventually start being friends again, and you can't be analyzing every part of your friendship, y'know? So just let BG do his thing and you do your thing. And when the band plays... think about that movie Drum Line or something. Lol. And who knows about Druggie? He may be the kind of person to change his ways if he has enough feelings for you. So like I said before, see where that goes, but be careful. Don't get in too deep before you know whether or not he can behave for you. But just have fun. :]

I'm glad you realized that Matt#1 thing was just a little mental confusion. :] How's Matt#2, by the way? I have a weird question, actually: is it weird that they're both named Matt? Haha, just wondering. :]

How much is too much?
That's a good question. I think when you're dating (and I'm talking a serious relationship here, not a little fling or middle-school type "going out" relationship) it's implied that you two should communicate more than you would with normal friends. The whole reason you date is to make a connection and see where that connection takes you; if you only talk as much as you would other people, what would the difference be in the relationship? See? If it's not a serious relationship, then not much more is expected than what's normal. So I guess you have to gauge what kind of relationship you have and then go from there. But if you're really committed, there's no such thing as being "pushy." You find a good balance for you as a couple.

Welcome to the thread. :] Can you date the same person twice? Sure. I see no reason why not. If you broke up for legitimate reasons and you both agree that you're ready to try it again because the feelings are still there, then there's no reason not to. But if you used to fight all the time, I'd be very careful when considering. Do you want that to happen again?; Would that happen again? These are questions you need to ask yourself and deal with. If you think you'll end up like you did the last time you dated, then it'd be a waste. If you think that you've both matured and changed a little bit and this next time around would be a better shot, then I say go for it. So just think about it, mull it over, and come to a decision that feels right for you. And jealousy? Hey, you can't help that. Everyone has it. Just don't let it get to you. Good luck. :]

FYI: Tropic Thunder is the funniest movie I've seen all year.
No real updates (since this afternoon lol). I went to McAlister's today and my brother's ex-friend Nate is the manager there. (They had a "falling out" because Nate is, to put it lightly, a douchebag.) But Nate and I always kind of teased each other (before he became a douchebag when he joined a frat house) and he was always my favorite of my brother's friends. Actually, I think he used to have a crush on me. (Which is weird because he's four years older...) So I couldn't tell if he was flirting with me or not. He let us use his special "manager's cash register" so he could check us out and then he didn't even give us a number so he could bring us our food. Then he came over and sat with us to "chat and catch up." He's so polite, I couldn't tell if he was just being polite or if it was because he was trying to flirt with me. Lol.
So that's my story.
Hopefully, I'll have a Matt update tomorrow... (Hopefully that update will say, "He didn't speak to me at all and I never crossed paths with him." But I doubt it.)
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Re: Dating Thread

Postby nissanmama » Sat Aug 23, 2008 9:46 pm

eternitys_charm wrote:so im quite a jealous person and i know a girl likes him right now that we're not together. What should i do??
I'm wondering if you really want to go out with him again or you just don't want this other girl to have him? To answer your first question, I think it's okay to go out twice if that's what you both want, but to examine why you broke up in the first place and see if those reasons still apply.

igotrhythm wrote:I've got a new dating question- How much is too much? Is talking to a guy for too long or very often(sometimes more often than to a lot of other people) being "pushy," or is it an expected part of the dating "experience"?
I actually asked FS about this. He said it's both. He said girls in general talk a lot, but that's kinda expected just 'cuz they're girls. He said it's kinda creepy if it's not someone you want to spend time talking to. ... directlink
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Re: Dating Thread

Postby tiffi » Sat Aug 23, 2008 11:42 pm

thanks christine (: your advice is great. lol fallin for a druggie is so not in my best intrest. but i kinda had a dream about him..... and ive become such a horoscope person now lol. seventeen mag and my facebook horoscope said id meet a cute boy on august 16th. and i did. druggie. ugh i dont kno whats wrong with me!!!! ive hardly known him but.........

good luck with matt tomorrow. i hope its not akward.

simplymortal314 wrote:
Do you think it would be wiser to start school single, or something else?

single!! you just DONT want to be tyed down when you have so many options! people change over the summer. stay single for at least two weeks. flirt outragously and find the guy you click with.

ill tell ya what was missing from Breaking Dawn! a full paragraph... page... CHAPTER of edward cullen naked!!!

splenda is splendid........:D
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Re: Dating Thread

Postby Reverie » Sun Aug 24, 2008 1:43 am

This is just my all time favorite moment that I can think of.

It was the beginning of August this year. It was one week after my boyfriend broke up with me, it was a need to do thing.. college differences and all that.. and it had to be broken off before it became too hard. So It was around 12 when I signed online and he was on, so like usual, we talked for awhile and he said something about how he was holding back.. and I didn't know what he was talking about.

Him: You have no iea how much I want to kidnap you right now.
Me: Kidnap me? It is pretty late, I don't know what we would even do.
Him: I don't really care, I just want to see you again.

So.. for the first time ever.. I snuck out of my house and met up with him. We ended up going out onto a country road. For an hour we stayed there talking about everything and anything. He brought a blanket and we watched the stars in the middle of nowhere. It was the most amazing experience ever. So many shooting stars and a comet too.
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Re: Dating Thread

Postby wishingiwasbella » Sun Aug 24, 2008 7:42 am

igotrhythm wrote:.

I've got a new dating question- How much is too much? Is talking to a guy for too long or very often(sometimes more often than to a lot of other people) being "pushy," or is it an expected part of the dating "experience"?

I think moderation when talking is a good thing, because if you talk for HOURS and HOURS every night then soon enough wou'll run out of things to talk about. (Unless they go to school with you and know your friends and vice versa). I'm not sure what you mean on the pushy part, it depends, is it just like you ignore other people but him and then try to talk to him only? I guess that seems slightly pushy.

as for Dinner Idea's, I'm a total Cheap date. Lol. I could go to McDonald's and eat off the dollar menu. :-). But if it was to a fancy restraunt, I think I'd have to say a Steak house, not a tacky one but a nice sit down steadk house.
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Re: Dating Thread

Postby lovemesomecullensss » Sun Aug 24, 2008 10:11 am

Oh FS. Not ALL girls talk a lot... :roll: Lol. ;]

Haha, it's totally okay to follow horoscopes and such. Just don't let them decide what you do. They can affect your decision, but they can't make it. Just keep that in mind. :]

Welcome to the thread! :] Awwwwn, that sounds so cute! At least you two are still close and the break up didn't make things awkward. :]
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Re: Dating Thread

Postby BlackLace » Sun Aug 24, 2008 1:37 pm

So sorry that I haven't been able to catch up sooner!
At work they have given me like a billion hours lately,
which is fine with me, because I love the cash money lol.

LMSC usually does a nice job ;) lol

But in the spare time, I will tell of my new adventures.
...ANDY. We have done the K word. *eh hem* Kiss! lol
SO we were sitting one night in his truck just like looking at the stars
and I was getting so frustrated. So i actually yelled "OH MY GOSH DO SOMETHING!"
Then he was looking at me and he was like "I...think I know what you want me to say..."
(and i didn't want him to say anythign I was just so bored...and plus i was like waiting for a kiss lol)
and he like wasn't saying I told him "If you say it. I'll break my ONE RULE."
My one rule being that I never make the first move. lol but he didn't know that.
So he was like " ok?" and then he got really really nervous and said "So...since we've
started hanging out, I guess I've really started to like you." MAJOR AW!! lol
And then he looked at me and smiled, and said "So...I think your suppose to break your one rule now?"
lol so I did. :D

SO YEAH. lol
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Re: Dating Thread

Postby a_n_n_a » Sun Aug 24, 2008 2:36 pm

igotrhythm wrote:How much is too much? Is talking to a guy for too long or very often (sometimes more often than to a lot of other people) being "pushy," or is it an expected part of the dating "experience"?

If you're seriously dating someone, I don't think it would be strange to talk on a very regular basis, especially if they don't go to your school or if they live farther away. Because you might not see them very often, it's important to keep the lines of communication open. I don't think you should ever feel bad about calling someone often if you're dating. It's like, if the person is truly interested in making a bigger connection with you, they should be willing to talk whenever you feel like you need to.

nissanmama: I liked your take on my previous question much better than how I posed it. I couldn't figure out how to write what I wanted, but you articulated it very nicely. Thanks for that! And even though FS says "girls talk a lot", we can hold back, too. I know I do. I feel like I talk much less than other girls, especially with a few close church friends. We can sit around without saying a word for hours at a time and still not be bored or confused.

eternitys_charms: As others have said, take a step back and look at your reasoning. You say you both like each other, and that's great. If you broke up mutually before because of circumstances and you feel like you can put it back together, then do so. But if you feel yourself falling back into the same patterns of irritation and arguing, don't get yourself in too deep. It's okay to question how you're feeling now, and don't think it's weird if you don't want to get back together if you realize it's just jealousy.

BlackLace: Wow, that's great for you! I'm glad things have gone well and have panned out very nicely.

As for me: Last night I texted Marcas while I was at a bonfire kind of party. We were sitting around the fire, and even though I shouldn't be texting at all, I just felt like it. Apparently he thought about calling me on Friday night but then didn't? Something like that . . . Once I got home and changed into basketball shorts I called him, that was around 11 my time. We just kept talking, and it was really nice. I remembered that I had written down some stuff to ask him, but then I couldn't find the notebook where I had written it. He was really eager then to see what it was because I made it seem really important I guess. So then I was like, "You can ask me whatever you want, the door is open." And he's going to take me up on that offer. It was really funny because he said something like "I'm going to ask some serious questions", so I'm like, "Yeah, okay . . ." But he gets pretty serious then and is like "I'm not kidding. There's going to be some emotional attachments." I still kind of laugh though and I'm just like "I've definitely been there before". [Meaning with Landon] His deadline is the end of the week to come up with his list. I'm pretty excited and interested.
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